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Dealing with loss and taking actions

Many situations in life bring us the feeling of irreparable harm, usually involving loss or major changes: diseases, someone's death, city change, employment, social status, separation, loss of a dream or ideal and others. The most painful situations refer to the loss of a loved one and that is why you need help.

People get a sense of having been robbed of something to which they were entitled. Go through a painful process that involves suffering, fear, anger, anger, guilt, depression, isolation, lack of interest in usual activities or excessive activities (leakage); have physical and psychological symptoms of stress and may even come to get sick.

It does take time

The time required for the "mourning" (greater pain phase) and how to live it depends much on the loss of circumstances, the significance of this for the person, his particular way of dealing with crisis situations, support available in their midst family and social, as the community lives where views this loss, his own beliefs and other aspects.

The recovery of a significant loss takes a few months to two years and, even then, some aspects may still not well resolved.

But beyond the sadness, the painful situations can cause us to discover in ourselves forces previously unknown causes us to rethink our lives and our values, starting to realize what is really important and what is superfluous, and can turn us into people richer spiritually and emotionally.

We do react differently, however decisions need to be taken.

Although people feel and react differently, there are commonalities in loss situations, when usually go through similar stages. When they discover they are with a serious illness or it happens to someone very close, the unexpected death of someone they love, or almost all other types of loss, first pass through the shock stage and denial, not wanting to believe in the reality. Then comes the phase of anger, rebellion (against everything, everyone and even against God) and a lot of heartache. Later start to negotiate with God and with life, trying to make changes and promises; then get depressed, wondering "why me?", "why he (or she)?" or "why me (or us)?".

Following the trend is the retraction up for a while, away from the other, while seeking to achieve a state of understanding, peace, acceptance; to accept what can not be changed. Many stop at some stage and not go ahead in overcoming the loss that has happened or, in the case of illness, will occur; some jump from one phase to another, and may return to the previous phases; others walk to the overrun. This will greatly depend on the support they receive from the media, friends, therapists or counselors; the understanding they have about life and its purpose, its philosophical and / or religious beliefs and other aspects.

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